How to Have a Better Orgasm

Dr. Alyssa Dweck

Written by Dr. Alyssa Dweck, MS, MD, FACOG, Chief Medical Officer

Dr. Alyssa Dweck

Written by Dr. Alyssa Dweck, MS, MD, FACOG, Chief Medical Officer

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The female orgasm is an enticing topic, and without question, one that piques every woman’s interest. But weak orgasms or lack of orgasm, lower libido and lack of sexual desire, especially during menopause, can seemingly come out of nowhere, causing concern and frustration.

If you’re suddenly finding it harder to achieve orgasm or have noticed your orgasm is weaker than it used to be, rest assured there’s usually an explanation. Here’s what you need to know about weak orgasms, and what you can do to orgasm better.

What Happens in the Body During a Female Orgasm?

Before we talk about what causes weak female orgasms, let’s talk about what happens when women orgasm, in general. If you ask Google, an orgasm is “a climax of sexual excitement, characterized by feelings of pleasure centered in the genitals.” Physiologically, the genitals become engorged with blood, the heart rate soars, genital muscles contract, and oxytocin and dopamine are released by the brain. In short, it feels fabulous.

The clitoris is central to the female orgasm. Don’t be fooled: the clitoris isn’t just the tiny structure you see externally. It’s actually quite extensive with crura, or legs, which extend well into the labia. Other fun facts? The clitoris houses more than 8,000 nerve endings so, it’s super sensitive! It has erectile tissue, similar to the penis in a man, and becomes engorged and erect with stimulation. It’s no wonder that most women need direct clitoral stimulation to achieve orgasm. In fact, more than 70% of women will not achieve orgasm from intercourse alone.

What Causes Weak Orgasms, and How Can You Orgasm Better?

The cause behind weaker or nonexistent female orgasms isn’t always crystal clear, but there are some things you can do and keep in mind to help improve the situation, and potentially have a better orgasm:

  • Be present. Surely, you’re not going to reach orgasm if you’re stressed about what happened at work today or everything you need to get done tomorrow. It’s vital to put that busy mind to rest and be in the moment if you’re trying to achieve a better orgasm and potentially improve your libido.
  • Optimize your lifestyle for sex. A healthy diet means a healthy heart and a healthy weight. I recommend the heart healthy Mediterranean diet as a lifestyle. Smoking interferes with blood flow, including to the genitals. Just don’t smoke. Alcohol is ok in moderation. Exercise is beneficial; if biking or spin class is your thing, adjust your seat and handlebars to avoid numbness to the vulva. Nerve compression around the vulva can definitely influence female orgasm potential.
  • Address any underlying medical issues. Hypertension, cardiovascular disease and diabetes, if left untreated, can negatively influence blood flow, including to the genitals. Less blood to the genitals means less sexual satisfaction; it may even suppress the female orgasm and libido, or sexual desire. Remember to manage chronic medical issues.
  • As hormone changes occur during menopause, so might the female orgasm experience. What used to feel like a thunderstorm might seem like a light drizzle now, and that can be a frustrating change. Occasionally, lack of adequate lubrication is the issue. You can ensure vaginal moisture and lubrication with foreplay, or you can look to your favorite lube or vaginal moisturizer for a little help. 

Some women prefer to use topical, vaginal estrogen to supplement their own decline of hormones, and that’s ok too. I also recommend that women use certain sex toys to enhance stimulation, more specifically a vibrator. Vibration can help to enhance blood flow and female orgasm…consider it the doctor’s orders!

You may also want to consider more natural options for supporting female orgasm, including the incorporation of specific dietary supplements into your daily routine. One option for addressing weak orgasm is French maritime pine bark extract, which is a natural plant extract known for being rich in nutrients that are anti-inflammatory and antioxidants. In addition to those pro-health properties, researchers have found that French maritime pine bark extract can help increase blood flow, which can aid in making the female orgasm experience better.

The health benefits of sex and orgasm have been demonstrated over and over again. Orgasms feel great, relieve stress, help with sleep, burn calories, strengthen pelvic floor muscles and provide a general sense of well-being. True, at times the stars may need to be aligned to achieve orgasm… but a little help with the tips above certainly can’t hurt!


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I’m glad my gynecologist told me about this website I’m learning everything about menopause and my vaginal issues at the age of 49 years and heading in my 50 years. Thanks to my Gynecologists for this website and information I never knew about.

Tequillia Alexander on

Started using Ristela in September and haven’t stopped. I love the results and I appreciate the suggestions. I will be continuing to use Ristela

Dana on

Not only did the stars have to align, but the whole world had to as well. Before Ristela it took a lot of work to climax. Younger me is back baby, and hubby loves it. I was so happy with a 2 week sample, I prayed it would keep working. I got almost immediate results. I’m on my 2nd bottle.

Tracy on

Since taking Ristella, my life has changed, literally! I can’t say enough about it. I had no libido and now I have more sexual desire than I ever have. I am 66 and learning that I can do things in the bedroom with my husband to enhance our sexual partnership and learning what pleases me and asking for it, which he really gets into. Ladies, it is true that men really don’t see that little bit of extra around your middle, or that your breasts aren’t as perky as they used to be. Men are very “visual” in nature and I understand it more now than ever. My husband loves a light on in the bedroom or an a-joining room so he can see what WE are doing. I am trying new ideas and things in the bedroom that I never would have before thanks to Ristella!

MJ on

I have been using ristela and revaree for 3 months now and I am extremely pleased. I was doubtful until around the 8 -9 weeks mark. I wished it was more affordable but I don’t drink so I guess my money can go towards my health.
I really am so thankful for it giving me my drive back. I feel like a whole woman again. Having a low sex drive really hit my self-esteem and made me feel depressed. I feel like the younger version of myself and it brought back intimacy my relationship.

Lyn G on

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* These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.

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