Menopause is a natural part of life, but vaginal dryness and painful sex isn’t exactly the kind of “change” someone gets excited about. Unfortunately, myths, misunderstandings and the lack of candid conversations can leave many women feeling unsure about what to do about these disruptive symptoms during menopause.
The truth? Menopause might have its challenges, but it doesn’t mean your sex life or comfort during intimacy have to take a backseat. With the right support, like the perfect sexual lubricant, you can feel confident, comfortable, and ready to embrace this new chapter with confidence.
Vaginal lubricants aren’t just for those intimate moments; they can also offer daily relief from symptoms like burning, itching and irritation, and help you feel more like yourself again – but be advised, the type of lubricant you choose does make a difference regarding the benefits you can achieve.
And here’s the best part: there’s most-often a lube for everyone, whether you’re dealing with sensitive skin, need long-lasting hydration, or just want to spice things up in the moment.
Here we talk about how the best sexual lubes for menopause can make all the difference, including options for managing menopausal dryness, pain with intimacy, and even day-to-day discomfort. Menopause shouldn’t slow things down in your life; it should be about finding new ways to thrive, embrace your well-being, and live confidently.
Why Does Vaginal Dryness Happen During Menopause?
In this instance, you can blame it on hormones. As estrogen levels drop during the menopause transition, vaginal and vulvar tissue becomes thinner, less elastic, and, unfortunately, less lubricated. While these changes are part of the natural aging process, they can cause some frustrating and persistent symptoms, like vaginal itching, irritation, or discomfort during intimacy.1
But here’s the thing: menopause doesn’t have to mean the end of an enjoyable sex life and uncontrolled discomfort. A little help from the right lubricant can make a world of difference…think of it as your new bedside BFF.
The Benefits of Personal Lubricants During Menopause
Menopause brings a variety of changes to the body, and one of the most common, and often overlooked, symptoms is vaginal dryness. It’s more than just an inconvenience in the bedroom; it can affect everyday life with symptoms like burning and itching,2
These issues can impact not only physical comfort, but also emotional well-being, as they often create unnecessary stress or embarrassment around the topic of intimacy. The good news is that lubricants are a simple, yet highly effective solution for most of the abovementioned symptoms. They can help reduce friction, provide moisture, and offer immediate relief, whether you’re managing irritation or looking to enhance intimacy in the moment.
With so many options available, from water-based to silicone-based formulas, there’s likely a product designed to meet your specific needs and preferences.
Types of Lubricants: What to Know
Not all lubricants are created equally, and it’s important to find one that fits your unique preferences and needs. Additionally, it’s helpful to note that sexual lubricants are also different from vaginal moisturizers.
So, let’s break down some of the key things to know about personal lubricants: 3
● Water-Based Lubricants: Lightweight, easy to clean, and versatile. Great for use with toys and condoms but may need frequent reapplication.
● Silicone-Based Lubricants: Long-lasting and silky-smooth—perfect for extended intimacy. Just keep them away from silicone toys.
● Oil-Based Lubricants: Natural and moisturizing, but they’re not condom-compatible and might stain fabrics.
● Hybrid Lubricants: A mix of water and silicone, offering a balance of ease and durability.
It’s also very important to review all of the ingredients before starting any new lubricants, just as a precaution, and especially if you’re sensitive.
Best Lubes for Menopause: Our Top Picks
Here we’ve rounded up some of our thoughts around the best lubes for menopause, because you deserve nothing but the best:
Water-Based Lubricants:
Water-based lubricants are often the go-to choice for many people dealing with vaginal dryness, including during menopause. These lubes are gentle on the skin and are designed to mimic your body’s natural lubrication.4 Plus, they’re versatile, safe to use with condoms and sex toys, which makes them a convenient option for enhancing intimacy.5 As with any lubricant, as mentioned, it’s imperative to check ingredients first, especially if you have sensitive skin.
A high-quality, water-based lube will be pH-balanced, which is key for maintaining vaginal health. This is especially important during menopause when hormonal shifts can disrupt the vagina’s natural balance, leading to increased sensitivity or irritation. Water-based lubes don’t leave a sticky residue, and they’re easy to clean off, so there’s no mess after use.6
It’s also important to know what the osmolality of a water-based lubricant is. Osmolality essentially measures the concentration of particles dissolved in a fluid. The World Health Organization (WHO) recommends using personal lubricants with an osmolality below 1,200 mOsm/kg or lower – osmolality that’s either too high or too low can negatively affect the water content in vaginal cells.7
Key Benefits: 8
● Gentle and non-irritating: Ideal for those with sensitive skin, which can become more prone to irritation during menopause. Still, be sure to check all the product ingredients, especially if you are sensitive.
● Safe with condoms and toys: Perfect for ensuring compatibility with all your intimacy needs.
● Cost Effective and easily accessible: Options are non-prescription and are almost always available for purchase directly at your local pharmacy.
● Lightweight and easy to clean: No sticky feeling and no stains, just comfort.
Best Water-Based Lubes for Menopause
As noted above, water-based lubes are a popular choice for women in menopause because they’re versatile, easy to clean, gentle on delicate skin and are often the first choice recommended by healthcare providers. The best water-based lubes mimic the body’s natural moisture while maintaining a healthy, balanced vaginal pH. They’re safe to use with toys, condoms, and various medical devices, making them a great all-around option.
Water-based lubes are especially good to consider for everyday dryness relief, as they provide on demand moisture and a decrease in friction, without leaving any sticky residue.
Best pH-Balanced Lubricant Options:
If you are particularly concerned about your vaginal pH balance which can be thrown off during menopause, then look for a lube that specifically addresses this concern.
During menopause, hormonal changes can elevate your vaginal pH balance, making it more vulnerable to infections or irritation. A pH-balanced lubricant can help maintain the natural acidity of your vagina, which can promote better vaginal health and comfort.9 These lubes are formulated to match the vagina’s natural pH levels, keeping things smooth while protecting against issues like dryness or discomfort.
Many pH-balanced lubricants are also free of fragrances and parabens, which is especially beneficial for sensitive skin. Harsh chemicals can irritate delicate vaginal tissues, but a pH-balanced lube can reduce the risk of that happening.10
Key Benefits of pH-Balanced Lubricants:11
● Maintains vaginal health: Keeps your pH levels balanced, reducing the risk of irritation and discomfort.
● Great for everyday use: Helps with both intimacy and supporting general vaginal moisture and decreased friction, so you can stay comfortable all day long.
Aloe-Based Vaginal Lubricants (Organic):
Aloe vera is known for its soothing and healing properties on the skin, which makes it a potential option for menopause-related dryness or irritation. Organic, aloe-based lubricants can provide deep hydration while being gentle on the skin.12
Organic aloe vera is gentle on sensitive or irritated skin, making it a great choice for menopausal women. Aloe has hydrating properties that not only soothe, but also can help replenish moisture, where it’s needed most. Because it’s a plant-based ingredient, aloe-based lubes are often free from harsh chemicals or artificial fragrances that could potentially cause irritation.
Key Benefits:13
- Natural and soothing: Aloe vera helps to calm irritated skin and provides much-needed moisture.
- Gentle on sensitive skin: A good type for those with allergies or those looking for a more natural option.
- Hydrating and refreshing: Leaves your skin feeling cool, moisturized, and soft without the sticky residue.
- Organic and chemical-free: Provides peace of mind for those looking for a more natural ingredient, but always be sure to double-check ingredients as a precaution.
Silicone-Based Sexual Lubricants:
Silicone-based lubricants are optimal if you need a long-lasting option. These lubes are known for their smooth, silky texture and their ability to provide moisture for an extended period without needing reapplication. For menopausal women dealing with dryness, a silicone-based lubricant can make intimacy more comfortable and enjoyable by providing more moisture than many water-based options.14
Silicone lubricants are also thicker and offer superior slipperiness compared to water-based lubes. This makes them ideal for long-lasting intimacy or situations where you don’t want to reapply lubricant. Additionally, some silicone lubes include nourishing oils like coconut or avocado, which add even more moisture and help keep the skin feeling soft.15 Be advised, if using silicone-based lubricants in the shower, proceed with caution, as surfaces can become extra slippery with silicone lubricants, and don’t wash off easily.
Key Benefits:16
- Long-lasting: Provides extended moisture, reducing the need for frequent reapplication.
- Silky and smooth: Perfect for those seeking a luxurious, slippery feeling during intimacy.
- Moisturizing and rich: Often infused with oils like coconut or avocado to further hydrate and nourish the skin. If you’re allergic to these types of natural oils, or are concerned you could be, check with your healthcare provider first.
Best Lube for Sex During Menopause
When it comes to intimacy during menopause, the right lubricant can potentially help to transform your sexual experience. The best lubes for sex during menopause should provide long-lasting moisture, reduce friction, and feel natural. Silicone-based lubricants are known for their silky texture and durability, making them a good option for extended intimacy.
If you prefer a more natural option, plant-based lubes with soothing ingredients like aloe vera or coconut oil can enhance pleasure while being kind to sensitive tissues.17 Additionally, there are hyaluronic acid-based lubricants and moisturizers that are clinically studied, hormone-free, prescription-free and shown to be effective at reducing vaginal dryness and improving comfort during menopause and beyond.
Best Lube for Menopausal Dryness
Menopausal dryness can be challenging, but the right lubricant can significantly improve both daily comfort and intimacy. Consider looking for options designed to address symptoms associated with hormonal changes, such as water-based or silicone-based lubricants.
You can also try products that are pH-balanced and formulated for sensitive skin to achieve gentle, effective relief. These lubricants not only help to alleviate dryness but also can restore comfort, helping you feel confident and more like yourself again.18
What to Watch Out for When Selecting a Lubricant
When shopping for personal lubricants, especially if you are sensitive or prone to infection, do your best to steer clear of these common irritants:
● Glycerin: A sugar byproduct, it can disrupt the vaginal pH and lead to infections.19
● Petroleum Jelly: While it sounds moisturizing, it’s a no-go for vaginal health.20
● Spermicides or Warming Agents: These can irritate sensitive tissues.21
Tips for Choosing Your Perfect Match
Everyone’s body is different, and what works wonders for one woman might not be ideal for another. Consider keeping these tips in mind when looking for the best lube for menopause:22, 23
● Check labels for potential allergens or irritants.
● Look for pH-balanced formulas to support vaginal health.
● Consider texture preferences, i.e. some women prefer a light feel, while others like something richer.
And don’t be afraid to experiment! Finding the right lubricant can be part of rediscovering intimacy in a fun and empowering way.
Questions to Consider for Finding Your Perfect Lube
Not sure where to start when looking to try out a new sexual lubricant? Take a stab at answering these questions to discover the best lube for your particular needs:24, 25
- Do you want something easy to clean up?
Try Water-Based Lubes
Great for first-time users, water-based lubes are lightweight, versatile, and compatible with most toys and condoms. Look for options that focus on hydration and comfort. - Are you looking for something long-lasting for extended sessions?
Go for Silicone-Based Lubes
These lubes are silky smooth and long-lasting, ideal for postmenopausal dryness. They also work well in water, making them suitable for various activities. - Do you have sensitive skin or allergies?
Opt for Organic or Natural Lubes
Organic lubes are formulated without harsh chemicals, making them perfect for menopausal skin. Ingredients like aloe vera or coconut are gentle and soothing. - Do you need extra hydration for daily comfort?
Choose Moisturizing Lubes
Hybrid lubes provide both lubrication and long-term hydration, acting as a vaginal moisturizer and lubricant. They can help combat dryness to promote day-to-day comfort. Revaree® Plus is a great example of a product that is both a moisturizer and a lubricant. - Are you looking for a luxurious, all-natural option?
Consider Oil-Based Lubes
Oil-based lubes are rich and nourishing, offering a sensual experience. While they provide extra moisture, they’re not compatible with latex condoms and may stain fabrics.
Embrace This New Chapter
Menopause might bring some surprises (hello, random hot flashes and and sleepless nights), but it doesn’t have to throw a wet blanket on your sex life. Finding the right lube is like finding the perfect pair of jeans, once you get the right fit, everything feels just right.
So, whether you’re leaning into something water-based, silicone, or feel best about an organic option, remember, you’re not just buying a product, you’re taking steps to reclaim your sexual comfort and pleasure. Because menopause isn’t a stop sign; it’s a green light to rediscover yourself in new, exciting ways.
And hey, who says bedtime stories are only for kids? With the right lubricant, your bedroom adventures might just have their own new and very happy ending.
Resources:
- https://www.mymenopausecentre.com/blog/the-best-sex-toys-and-lubes-to-help-with-menopausal-sex/
- https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/vaginal-atrophy/symptoms-causes/syc-20352288
- https://www.breastcancer.org/treatment-side-effects/vaginal-dryness/moisturizers-lubricants
- https://www.healthline.com/health/menopause/best-lubricants-menopause-dryness#our-picks
- https://www.healthline.com/health/menopause/best-lubricants-menopause-dryness#our-picks
- https://www.healthline.com/health/menopause/best-lubricants-menopause-dryness#our-picks
- https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6834067/
- https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6834067/
- https://www.healthline.com/health/menopause/best-lubricants-menopause-dryness#our-picks
- https://womensvoices.org/lubricants-womens-health/
- https://www.healthline.com/health/menopause/best-lubricants-menopause-dryness#our-picks
- https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0378874120336485
- https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC2763764/
- https://www.mskcc.org/cancer-care/patient-education/vaginal-health
- https://www.mskcc.org/cancer-care/patient-education/vaginal-health
- https://www.mskcc.org/cancer-care/patient-education/vaginal-health
- https://www.healthline.com/health/menopause/best-lubricants-menopause-dryness#our-picks
- https://www.healthline.com/health/menopause/best-lubricants-menopause-dryness#our-picks
- https://www.healthline.com/health/menopause/best-lubricants-menopause-dryness#our-picks
- https://www.mskcc.org/cancer-care/patient-education/vaginal-health
- https://www.breastcancer.org/treatment-side-effects/vaginal-dryness/moisturizers-lubricants
- https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/best-lubricants-for-menopause-dryness#gennev
- https://www.nytimes.com/wirecutter/reviews/best-personal-lubricants/
- https://www.mskcc.org/cancer-care/patient-education/vaginal-health
- https://www.healthline.com/health/menopause/best-lubricants-menopause-dryness#our-picks
