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We’re Bringing Sexy Back: Sexy Lingerie is for Menopausal Women, Too!

Bonny Osterhag

Written by Bonny Osterhag

Bonny Osterhag

Written by Bonny Osterhag

Victoria may have her secrets, but we've got one too, and that is you don't have to be a size two or a twenty-something swimsuit model to look and feel sexy in lingerie. Even if gravity and age are no longer on your side, your menopausal years are no reason to reach for the "granny panties" or slouchy sleepwear.

Plenty of sexy, mature lingerie styles can lift, shape, support, or cover your (ahem) assets without binding, bulging, or breaking the bank. So, let’s talk through some lingerie options for mature women that can help you feel more attractive after menopause and beyond!

Bra Styles That Support and are Still Sexy During Menopause

If you’re looking for ways to feel attractive after menopause and are interested in lingerie styles that can help, one of the quickest ways to boost your breasts (and your confidence) is to invest in a well-fitting bra.

"It’s amazing to me that women will invest in a great pair of running shoes or anti-aging facial products, but they won't invest in good bra support," says Salina Hernandez, owner of The Bra Box in San Antonio, Texas.

A bra fit expert for more than 17 years, Hernandez explains that a properly fitted bra can eliminate issues like back bulge, sagging, gapping, or the discomfort of straps digging into the shoulders. Plus, it will create a more youthful silhouette.

“A great fitting bra will hug and hold around the bust line, which helps to lift the breasts back up to where they need to be,” she adds.

The best way to find your fit, is to go to a professional. Many lingerie and department stores offer complimentary bra fitting services. Once you’ve found your size, the next step is to try on a wide variety of sexy, mature lingerie styles and explore different materials.

“Not every bra style works for every body type,” explains Hernandez. “A good bra fitter can cater to your specific needs and concerns.”

One common concern among middle-aged or menopausal women is a loss of fullness in the breast, which can result in gapping in bra cups. For those women, Hernandez recommends a lace cup bra or one with a soft lining that will securely hug the breast and allow it to fill the cup.

Plus, who doesn't feel a little sexier in a lace undergarment like this one from Soma?

"Lace cup bras not only do a gorgeous job of lifting, but they also tend to be both flattering and supportive," she says, adding that they look incredibly flirty peeking out from a button-down blouse.

For a little more va-va-voom, Jasper St. James, the manager of the Sexology Institute in San Antonio, Texas, suggests a demi cup to “give a little shelf to the breast.” We like this one from CUUP for its lift and the lightweight, breathable mesh that adds just the right amount of see-through sexiness while helping you to stay cool during a hot flash.

Women with medium to small breasts may not experience the same sagging and drooping of their curvier peers, but they may have other issues. Menopausal belly bulging, or “meno-belly,” for example, can add to feelings of disproportion by accentuating smaller breasts as well as the waistline.

That's where a beautiful bralette can help.

This style is designed to flatter a wide range of sizes, but it’s especially flattering to small and medium-sized cups. We like this version from Cosabella for its sheer, sexy style and beautiful detailing.

Mature Lingerie that Helps with Menopause Middle

One of the most problematic areas for women during menopause is the midsection. Fortunately, there are more mature lingerie styles than ever to camouflage this area and make you look and feel fabulous rather than frumpy. 

"I think people are afraid of high-waisted, but today's styles aren't granny panties," assures St. James. "These bottoms are flattering and sexy while offering a little more tummy coverage."

Flutter panties, like this cut by Kilo Brava, are an excellent option for lightweight coverage that feels sexy and feminine.

"These sit a little higher on the hip and have a looser leg," describes St. James, adding that they are often silky with details like lace trim on the legs. Better under dresses and skirts or as part of a lingerie set, this style doesn't hug the body, so it typically doesn't irritate the vaginal area. That's important if you’re finding that vaginal dryness is a symptom you’re dealing with during menopause.

"There is nothing worse than having vaginal dryness and wearing something over your lady parts that doesn't breathe and causes irritation," adds Hernandez, who recommends avoiding cheap lace or panties without a sewn-in lining.

"Play it safe and stick with cotton gusset-lined panties," she suggests. A cotton hip hugger, like this one from Victoria’s Secret, offers more booty coverage while keeping you cool and dry, while a cute boy short, like this one from Me Undies, offers soft, breathable coverage on top with peek-a-boo lace trim on the leg.

If skin sensitivity isn’t an issue, you can play up your posterior with this Escante High-Waist Lace Up panty that offers full yet "cheeky" coverage with fun, flirty laces on the back.

Sexy Sleepwear for Mature Women

Night sweats are definitely not how you want to heat things up in the bedroom. However, they are a real problem for many women transitioning through menopause. That means that when shopping for mature lingerie and sexy sleepwear, you want something that looks, hot but keeps you cool.

That's where fabric makes all the difference.

Mesh, bamboo, and cotton are good choices thanks to their breathability. In addition, St. James recommends Polyspan, a polyester/spandex blend with moisture-wicking properties that feels cool and buttery against the skin.

As for style, anything goes as long as you feel good. So, if you've got gorgeous gams, go for a short, sheer gown or a cute cami and shorts set. Hernandez says one of her favorites is the Montelle Best Support Chemise for its soft texture, color selection, range of cup sizes, and pretty lace trim.

If your breasts are your best feature, play them up in a longer-length gown with a plunging neckline. We like this one from Bluebella, for the dramatic top and long, yet sheer bottom. Want to draw attention away from your tummy or derriere? Look for a loose fit that grazes and skims the body rather than clings. We love this luxurious silk gown from Julianna Rae, for a classically beautiful style. Or try a pair of silky men’s pajamas with a cropped, oversized top and flowy pants, like this tiger print set from Midnight Bakery.

Shopping for sexy lingerie can be daunting, regardless of age, but there’s no reason it has to be. St. James suggests making it a fun girl's day by bringing a trusted friend or two. He also recommends choosing styles and colors that YOU like, not what you think your partner will like.

"When you feel sexy and beautiful, you will act that way, and your partner will love it," he assures.

Remember,  the sexiest thing you can wear in the bedroom is confidence, and you won’t find that in any store.    


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* These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.

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